The Indian Girl's Guide: Episode 1

Now that the Dhool controversies are over, I finally am willing to come out from behind my rock and actually start blogging for KLKillahs again.

Its tough enough being a woman, but God definitely made you out of steel if you’re Indian and woman. We weren’t born with handbooks on how to deal with the boys (with built-in sarakku radars) and kaypoh aunties at weddings who merely want to know if you made it to Medicine like their soda-patti kanaadi daughters [glasses with lenses resembling the bottom of soft drink bottles, old school like]. Fret not for the KLKween is here to solve your woes. The frustration is over. Battle the KLKs and do it with style.

There’s the other bigger issue of being an Indian girl – being called a “Doke”. I’ve tried my level best to find some kind of information as to which KLKockster came up with this term or how it could have possibly evolved to have denoted a slut. Unfortunately, its still a mystery. If there’s anyone out there who has a clue, please kindly get in touch with us. I’ve never quite understood this term or how a woman/girl becomes termed a “Doke”. I’ve been in the position many times before when people have very haphazardly spewed the word out at me or at other women. It is quite disturbing.

Are you a doke because you dance at clubs? Because you go to clubs? Because you’re friendly and you do smile at people without believing they could actually take that as some slut-tendency? It is at this juncture where society rears its ugly head. Ever wondered why there isn’t a male term for a slut? What about a guy who doesn’t quite think of the consequences and would bed anything that has two legs and walks [never mind the walk part, just the being alive part is fine]? Are we so hypocritical that we would go to any level to judge a person merely on the first impression we see? True enough, one might argue that this is prevalent in any society, but honestly speaking I have rarely heard of such a widely existing term as “Doke” in any of the other societies around us.

Would we ever be content with the characters of the women around us? If she’s too stuck up or refuses to smile at you, you would mutter, “Aishwarya Rai-nu periya nenappu”(She thinks she is Aishwarya Rai). If she’s friendly and smiles at you or even makes conversation with you, she immediately gets termed as being easy or being a slut. What does this mean? Should all women just lock themselves up in their rooms till they get married and then live vicariously through their husbands? Or does this mean war? Should we start terming overly friendly men as some kind of sleaze bags?

What is that we want in this society which apparently respects equality? Doesn’t equality imply some sort of equal respect devoted to people regardless of gender? Or are we still stuck in some sort of a caveman mentality where we want to marry a virgin but mess around with the rest of the girls you deem as easy? What shall we do ladies?

I say we fight back. Don’t take it lying down. Firstly, don’t make yourself the enemy. Women who cannot support women are traitors and hypocrites. Don’t sit back and laugh if someone were to term anyone else you know a “doke” for it doesn’t mean that just because they didn’t term you a “doke” that its okay. It doesn’t matter cos you’re a woman too. For the men, remember everytime you deem another woman a slut, you’re merely insulting someone who could have been your mother/sister/daughter or even wife.